Year End Thoughts on Destiny, Thoughts and Becoming a Character

The winter solstice is a good time to reflect on the year that has passed. I've made the annual trek to Florida to meet with the family and catch up from the year. Many good things have happened. Minor operations, some not so minor, job changes and new jobs started. All in all it's been a good year.


I've been in a bit of a panic expecting the worst for the world economy and, thankfully, have been wrong so far. Maybe things won't fall apart. A friend of mine told me to stop thinking like that. The laws of attraction will make the thoughts come true.
There's the saying,

“Watch your thoughts, for they become words. Watch your words, for they become actions. Watch your actions, for they become habits. Watch your habits, for they become character. Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny."

Roohina Doloo's words ring true for me. I have learned that we see what we program ourselves to see. I needed that reminder. So this year I'll make that effort.


The plans to take the boat south are still in place. I intend to have the boat ready for my 55th birthday. There's much to be done. I'm trying for simplicity. Minimal electrical needs, not a lot of technical stuff and perhaps a composting head to simplify the plumbing system.


There is, of course, becoming proficient at sailing. What a waste to have the boat ready but not be able to make it go where I want it to!


Hopefully the finances will be ready too. Although I expect to be in the situation Sterling Hayden suggests here:

“To be truly challenging, a voyage, like a life, must rest on a firm foundation of financial unrest. Otherwise, you are doomed to a routine traverse, the kind known to yachtsmen who play with their boats at sea… cruising, it is called. Voyaging belongs to seamen, and to the wanderers of the world who cannot, or will not, fit in. If you are contemplating a voyage and you have the means, abandon the venture until your fortunes change. Only then will you know what the sea is all about. "I’ve always wanted to sail to the south seas, but I can’t afford it.” What these men can’t afford is not to go. They are enmeshed in the cancerous discipline of security. And in the worship of security we fling our lives beneath the wheels of routine – and before we know it our lives are gone. What does a man need – really need? A few pounds of food each day, heat and shelter, six feet to lie down in – and some form of working activity that will yield a sense of accomplishment. That’s all – in the material sense, and we know it. But we are brainwashed by our economic system until we end up in a tomb beneath a pyramid of time payments, mortgages, preposterous gadgetry, playthings that divert our attention for the sheer idiocy of the charade. The years thunder by, The dreams of youth grow dim where they lie caked in dust on the shelves of patience. Before we know it, the tomb is sealed. Where, then, lies the answer? In choice. Which shall it be: bankruptcy of purse or bankruptcy of life?”

The thought of striking out on my own, relying only upon my wits, is intimidating. Almost enough to keep me ashore. Almost. I know that I am not without friends and by placing myself out there I'll make more.

So looking forward I'll make these few promises to myself; more meditating, more positive thinking and more working on my character for thoughts eventually become character. I've always wanted to be known as a character!I'm just full of other people's words today. That's fine. That's how I've learned much of what I know. Sometimes I believe I have no original thoughts in my head.

Saying No to Saying No

I have been experimenting for the last year. I decided to stop saying ‘no’ to people when they ask me to do something.  The results have been interesting.

In my 'no' phase of life, I spent a lot of time at home and sat around biding my time.  I gained weight, wished I had more friends and got tied up in my own head waaay too much.

In my 'post no' phase I have been introduced to acting in a local theater group, been offered a weekend job watching some new friends’ dogs in their million dollar house and agreed to ride in the MS 150, a bicycle ride between Houston and Austin, Texas. I’ve even started this blog.

That time sitting in front of the tube passing the days away has been filled with new friends and interests. In a conversation with a dock buddy I described how busy I was these days and he commented that he’d rather not be beholden to someone else or overscheduled.  From there I went to the theater for rehearsal and he headed home to watch the game on TV.

I’ve always told myself that I was open to new ideas and things to experience. But reflecting back on that it was mostly talk.

I guess the gist of it is that while I’m more tired and a bit stressed about making the schedule work sometimes, I’m more engaged and enjoy myself more.

I’m even considering changing jobs. Now I’m convinced that really soon now the bottom will fall out of the economy and moving to a new job may not be the best idea. But I’m also convinced that life is just too short to hang back and be cautious. I’ve read about folks that have done just fine when they’ve taken a chance and failed.  They learn and they move on. I’ve done it a time or two myself. Playing it too safe is causing me to get cranky and life’s just too short.

Life on the Dock

Life on the dock suits me perfectly.  The people drawn to this lifestyle don’t care for a lot of possessions and don’t aspire to have the biggest, most of or most expensive things.  They’re individualists.  As my father calls them, “GDIs – goddamned independents.”  Many are retired and the rest go to work every day and come home to sit quietly in their boats, eat and go to bed.  There are a few that are here because of a life-changing injury or medical condition.  All are drawn to the water and the life on the docks. 

During the week the marina is quiet.  The rhythm of the place is different from the weekends. Think small resort town. Folks mingle at the palapala or the laundry and chat. The office is a meeting place for some. The staff is always ready to take a moment and talk.

During the summer the place fills up with weekenders. They show up with coolers and loud music and have their fun. Cars fill the parking lot. The ice machine runs out of ice faster. The sun, the heat and the energy; we all just wait them out. We know come fall they will put up their boats up and go home.

There is a bond among the liveaboards. There is a shared sense of purpose. Boats and the water are what bring us together. Regardless of the size of boat or the investment in it we pitch in to help each other out when needed.

The sense of community here is quite nice.  Never have I had so many friends. Perhaps I should have done this years ago.  Stories are swapped and everyone nods knowing they’ve heard this one before but no one stops the storyteller.

A couple of years ago I had a raging case of the flu. I was miserable. It kept me down for most of a week. About two days in, the marina manager came by with some hot, homemade soup and a box of crackers. Boy, was that a welcome sight! She checked up on me every day till I was able to get out on my own.

Most folks just don’t get the concept of living on a boat. I generally play it down. It’s nothing I’m ashamed of; it’s just difficult to explain. For 99.999 percent of people a house or apartment is all they think of. They want a bigger one or they’re looking for another one that’s just so or something like that. To shed most of your possessions and move into the space of a smallish RV is just crazy talk. I found it liberating. To know that I can go anyplace on the planet gives me a broader perspective. Since the Earth is 75% covered by water and the wind is an inexhaustible resource, I can literally go anywhere.

Sure. There’s a lot to do and learn but it’s possible. And that makes all the difference.

I'm Gonna Dance With the Gal I Brung to the Party

I bought my sailboat with the intention of taking it to the islands and living on it for an extended period. Of course, that begs the conversation about what a good liveaboard boat would be and what is the ‘perfect’ cruising boat is. You can waste a lot of time on these discussions.

Most of the folks I hear in these conversations are ‘armchair’ sailors.  For my own research I’ve had to learn to separate them from the folks that have actually gone out there and cruised. Those are the people I want to get my information from. Luckily, my favorite mechanic is one that has gone and come back. He and his family plan to go back out again soon. Not only have I seen his work, I trust his judgment on equipment and provisioning.

The road I’m taking is the ‘buy what you can afford now and go with it.’ I have learned from other projects earlier in life that I usually overdo the preparations only to realize later that I could’ve saved money or time by getting the basics together and going sooner. A lot of the stuff I thought I had to have turned out to be unnecessary.

As it is, I kinda dumb lucked myself into a good boat for the job. I bought a 1979 Cal 31 at auction and wound up with a full set of sails and a good diesel engine. All the pieces were there. Of course, with a 32-year-old boat there’s plenty to fix but for what I paid for the boat, I figured I could spend a bundle and still come out on the plus side of the balance sheet.

So for those that feel you have to have a full keel and a fin won’t do it; or a heavy boat or a shallow draft and other requirements, I’ll start here and learn. I’m gonna dance with the gal I brung to the party.

At the moment I don’t plan on ocean crossings. My experience level won’t allow that. Or in other words, I’m not suicidal. Cruising down the eastern coast of the Gulf is where I’m starting out. As my comfort level and skill level increases, I’ll go further afield. Sure. There are plenty of things you’ve just got to know before undertaking a project like this, but I’m not leaving just yet. I’ve got time to work out many kinks.

I’ve lived aboard going on five years now and I’ve learned quite a bit. Things like;

• Don’t hold anything in your hands while getting onto and off of the boat. You need to hang on to something and you don’t want to drop anything in the water.
• Look before you step. Make sure the steps are where you plan to put your foot. The boat has a funny way of moving just enough that you may end up stepping off into the lake.
• Boats move. Sometimes a lot. Depending on how much traffic there is the boat may lurch at just the wrong moment because of the waves. Try to be ready.
• Don’t take the boat out on the weekends or during holidays. It’s a bit like going to the mall on a ‘no tax’ weekend. There are boats zooming along from every direction and speed.
• When you do go out, make sure everything is either tied down or secured so it doesn’t fall when some fool passes you while throwing off a huge wake.
• Learn the rules of the road and then be prepared to improvise. You may know them but he may not.  
• Boats leak. Not always from below but from above. Keep pans handy. Then remember where the water came in and seal the leaks up.

These and many other things I’ve learned. They become second nature after a while; like not using the word ‘walk’ in hearing range of the family dog.

I’ve found that life aboard a boat is very relaxing. Too much so sometimes. With all of the best intentions, I plan to work on a project but somehow can’t seem to get going. Be it the calming waves, gentle breeze, the camaraderie of the other liveaboards or as is often in my case, inherent laziness I just don’t make the progress I intended. I plan to do a study on this topic.

Soon.

Yeah.

Real soon.

Planning as I am to go to the islands in a couple of years, there is much to be done and to learn.

Notes from the cube asylum

Dipping a toe in the blogsphere on my way to the islands.